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Less updates these days because I have been making an effort to sleep before 12 every weekday night. Plus I come home mentally exhausted with zero brain juice to even think of anything meaningful… except what to wear the next day. While sleeping early hasn’t completely rid me of the lethargy I feel at work every morning, it is still a step forward in, I don’t know, reducing my over-reliance on caffeine?

(Kopi-o, teh bing, yuan yang – I want them all!!)

Yeah.

Anyway, it’s been a good week work-wise, like OMG-I-can’t-believe-things-are-actually-going-well kinda week. I have been waiting for this weekend for the longest time – mostly because I will be seeing my favourite toddler Matthew this Sunday!!!!!! Babysitting duties await~

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So I was nua-ing on my sofa while my grandma watched the Star Awards and…

JJ LIN PERFORMED!!!!!

And it wasn’t just any performance – he performed his classics：会有那么一天，记得，Sarang Heyo etc. So so so nostalgic :’)

People are generally surprised when I tell them I listen to Chinese songs and I’m like… Dude, I’m Chinese too, why does it surprise you so much?!?! I can sing the chorus of Jay Chou’s 七里香 on-demand ok!

Anyway.

Point is, I really like JJ Lin’s old songs, especially 会有那么一天，一千年以后，翅膀 and 曹操. In fact, I think there were so many iconic songs between 2005 – 2010 that kinda defined that awkward tween/teenage period. At the top of my head, I remember listening to…

• Kelly Clarkson – Breakaway (album)
• Green Day – Holiday, American Idiot, Wake Me Up When September Ends
• High School Musical HAHAHAHAHA
• Backstreet Boys – I Want It That Way, Incomplete, Inconsolable
• Simple Plan – Perfect, Welcome to My Life
• Taylor Swift – Teardrops on My Guitar, Love Story
• The Click Five – Jenny
• Boys Like Girls – The Great Escape, Thunder, Hero/Heroine, Love Drunk
• Britney Spears – Toxic, Crazy, Everytime, Womaniser
• Avril Lavigne – Complicated, When You’re Gone, The Best Damn Thing, Innocence, Sk8ter Boi (LOL)
• Linkin Park – Numb, In the End, Somewhere I Belong
• Rihanna – Unfaithful, Umbrella, Pon de Replay
• Lady Gaga – Bad Romance, Pokerface, Paparazzi, Alejandro
• SHE – 中国话，五月天，Superstar
• Mayday – 天使，恋爱-ing, 倔强，私奔到月球
• Jay Chou – 借口，我不配，安静，彩虹，稻香，不能说的秘密
• 张韶涵 －不想懂得，亲爱的，那不是爱情，隐形的翅膀
• 欧得洋 －孤单北半球

And not forgetting  郭美美’s 老鼠爱大米, 光良’s 童话 and 卓文萱/曹格’s 梁山伯与茱麗葉 LOL.

Okay, here’s a Spotify link to JJ Lin’s 会有那么一天. Love the lyrics. So simple yet so touching :’)

(Thank God for Spotify; I think they can consider hiring me as their influencer because this is the second time I have written about them HAHA #PRtalk #kidding)

 

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Today comprised six hours of non-stop MM. Somehow I didn’t dread this as much as I thought I would but I guess seeing the agency’s active efforts in pushing for media coverage coming to fruition is more than enough to justify the tediousness of clipping and summarising news. (Also because last week our client praised our work HAHA I am such a loser.)

I also ran a few errands in the afternoon where I met the sweetest taxi driver who insisted on driving me to my exact location even though it was inconvenient for him. All right I am doing a bad job at explaining this because that is what taxi drivers are paid to do – drive you to your destination – but it was his sincere tone of voice and him being worried that I would get lost (do I really give off this vibe) that made my afternoon 🙂

Then I also met this elderly lady at a taxi stand where she requested for me to support her as she walked down the steps to a taxi that was waiting for her. Just before I closed her door, she said “God bless” and while I am not the most religious person around (I do read the bible and occasionally pray but… story for another day), I replied with a “God bless you too” before closing the door.

It is when people say and do the smallest things like these that make me question if I truly deserve all that I have. Admittedly, I have been struggling with some thoughts for a while now but today’s events have reminded me to be less self-centred and instead to see beyond myself. While I think I have grown in some areas, there are several other aspects of myself that seem to have – for lack of a better word – retracted. I have yet to figure out what all of these mean in the grander scheme of things but suffice to say, I am still a work-in-progress, as is everybody else.

Tl;dr: I am grateful for all that happened today. To borrow GE2015’s buzzword, I am quite humbled 🙂

 

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Three good things happened at work today:

1. Submitting a deck two minutes before the deadline and feeling quite satisfied with the effort SY and I put in 🙂
2. (Finally) receiving news of expected coverage for an account I’m leading
3. Getting to know more about a client whom I have previously thought of as intimidating. Turns out she’s pretty understanding and appreciative of the work we have been doing! 🙂

Drowning myself in work (i.e. being an escapist) and going home tired af every day but I’ve gotten used to this… I think. Also forced myself to watch the penultimate episode of DotS. (I watched the first episode when it premiered and I was like… wtf that phone drop. I have also concluded that Song Hye Kyo is flawless???! K-beauty magic!!) Can’t wait for this drama to be over lol maybe my life will be easier after that three-part special next week.

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Thanks for the likes, guys 😂

I think my brain is a lot more active after starting PI (whether this is a welcoming change is debatable) and one pleasant outcome from this is that I now have plenty of content to ponder and write about.

(That’s if y’all are not sick of receiving my email notifications 3 – 4x weekly.)

There are many activities I find therapeutic, but nothing comes quite as close as writing because of the complex thought process that precedes every word. I can’t quite explain it but I guess I tend to revel in such nerdy pursuits. Like how I secretly enjoy writing subtly-worded emails to clients to persuade them to adopt our strategic counsel without being overt about it. The key is to always provide logic behind your recommendations.

But that’s a story for another day.

There is also the autonomy of writing on a personal blog – of which the perks that come along with it are already well-documented on the web. I personally like know I have control over what I write. Maybe I’ve never acknowledged this, but I suppose I am indeed a perfectionist when it comes to writing, at least.

Anyway, it’s *finally* Friday! I really need to stop feeling this high-strung but this weekend, I suspect, is going to be like the last… 😦 I don’t expect an overnight change in my worrywart habits (haha sorry…) given how I seem to have confidence issues when it comes to surviving Mondays and Tuesdays. I’ll work on it, though 🙂

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Wanted to post this on Sunday but my mind was buzzing with negative vibes.

(I realise I look damn xmm with my glasses O.O)

If there is one decision I will never regret, it would be choosing WKW.

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(Self-indulgent rant ahead. Read at your own risk.)

Because why not.

I don’t know if I have ever made this clear enough, but I really, really hate Sunday evenings.

And it’s not too difficult to guess why.

It doesn’t matter if I’m out with friends or chilling (not exactly, more like overthinking shit) at home, every Sunday evening I magically descend into this abyss of pseudo-depression. Without. Fail. It gets a lot worse when I know I have a shitload of work to clear during the week.

Like in this upcoming week, which is why I have decided to unleash all my angst now and here.

Sometimes it does come to a point where I can’t bring myself to truly enjoy weekend activities because I dread the impending week so much…… This dread is usually augmented after particularly rewarding weekend activities, ugh.

I don’t even know why exactly I’m feeling this way. I have a supportive work environment, I am usually ahead of my work schedule, I haven’t made any fatal mistakes that would jeopardise my company’s/our clients’ reputation. In essence, in terms of work performance, I think I’m doing fine.

(Meticulous, they say, but the truth cannot be farther from that. I die a little inside when people say that because I am the least detail-oriented person I know.)

But there you go. That’s a whole lot of unladen expectations. Couple that with my impossibly high personal expectations, I think I am doomed to break apart someday, somehow.

The thought of surmounting a five-day work week – unscathed, no less – is daunting. Nowadays I feel as though I am treading on thin ice – one misstep and I will find myself falling into the deep waters. Every day I triple, quadruple-check my emails and media materials to ensure all my bases are sufficiently covered. Tedious, but mandatory. It is this fear of messing up the tiniest details that stresses me the most. Even one wrong date can be costly.

Then there is also this masochistic side of me that somehow indulges in wondering how much stress I can take before I start crumbling into pieces. No, scratch that, make that smithereens. I don’t think I am near my breaking point yet…

(Or maybe I am in denial.)

As a concluding thought, the idea of being a perfectionist never occurred to me until one of my colleagues (who is highly perceptive) said I was one.

Where does that lead to? I don’t know.

All I know is I really want to fall into a deep slumber and not wake up… Forever.

… Fuck.

(Edit: Think I’ve pissed off a reporter ha ha ha oh well some things are not within our control anyway ~平常心~)